Weight Loss When the Odds Seemed to be Stacked Against You

I’ve struggled with weight for about 12 years now.  Three years ago I wrote this post: https://wordpress.com/post/42194332/326/  which gets a ton of views every day, but I still have yet to lose a significant amount of weight to take me out of the “morbidly obese” category.  After trying and failing on many diets, workout plans, attempted lifestyle changes, doctors visits and labs all with no success and no answers, I became frustrated and needed better answers.  Bear with me for this long story, but maybe it will help someone else?  I apologize for the possible TMI in this post, but, I just want to be completely honest and open about my experience! There are so many amazing pieces to the puzzle and the way our bodies work that I really can’t comprehend most of it, but now that I have some answers I can start chipping away at the problems that keep me overweight.

I didn’t become over 100 pounds overweight until my early/mid 20’s (I’m 32 now). Some of these changes occurred because I changed from an active job on my feet 8 hours per day to sitting at a desk for the past 12 years. As my life became busier, I became less and less active. This made me less and less motivated to even attempt to exercise since my weight and sitting all day made it nearly impossible to do anything longer than 10-15 minutes which hardly seemed worthwhile.

I’m busy! I’m a working mom, and a minister’s wife. I work 40 hours a week, plus any other outside creative jobs I take on, plus church services. I have two kids – one is 1, one will be 4 in a few weeks. We have one car and an hour and a half commute to work and back home each day.  Who has time for anything else? I can barely keep my house semi-decent looking!

My two pregnancies both ended up with early onset gestational diabetes I was tested at the normal 28 weeks the first pregnancy but probably had it sooner since I had such rapid weight gain the first trimester. The 2nd pregnancy I also had rapid weight gain the first trimester and was tested at 17 weeks. The 1st pregnancy I was able to keep my numbers down with diet until the last month or two and they put me on a pill (can’t remember what it was, but not metformin).  The 2nd pregnancy I was not so lucky. Regardless as to how controlled my diet was, my numbers were still high and the pill wasn’t working, so I had to give myself insulin injections. I’ve had two c-sections, and after each birth my glucose levels returned to normal, but my body has proven that it is very insulin resistant.  It’s so frustrating when your doing all that you can possibly do to maintain decent numbers with gestational diabetes, yet, your body keeps fighting you! One doctor (rudely) told me during my last pregnancy that I was taking a lot of insulin and if I didn’t get my numbers under control, that I would end up with Type 2 Diabetes after my pregnancy. Thanks for your vote of confidence lady…..Each year I have to return to the doctor to be tested for diabetes. So far, just over a year out, a clean bill of health.

A year after my first pregnancy I seemed to still have signs of some sort of hormone imbalance, but I didn’t quite know what was wrong. I went to an internal medicine doctor, as well as an endocrinologist and had a ton of labs run to test for a number of things – diabetes, thyroid, adrenal gland, testosterone levels, PCOS, to name a few.  At that time my levels came back all within normal range.  My cholesterol and blood pressure were all just fine.  So I received no answers. Essentially, I was a “healthy” fat person. The doctor told me that if regular weight loss methods weren’t working for me then my only other option was bariatric surgery (except, um, these surgeries require you to have several co-morbidities and the only issue I had was that I was morbidly obese/high BMI!). I wouldn’t even qualify for the surgery if I wanted to. I gave up, feeling like there was something wrong with me still, but no one could figure out what it was.

Last September (2014) after doing some research, I decided to get the Paragard IUD put in.  My body doesn’t respond well to hormone birth control. My emotions are a roller coaster, and I have what I jokingly call psychotic rages (once during our first year of marriage I got so upset at my husband that I kicked over a plant in our living room spraying dirt and leaves everywhere, to which I then responded by sitting on the kitchen floor sobbing about how the plant that my mom had given me for my birthday was now ruined…..coo coo! My husband just stared at me, jaw dropped. He didn’t really know whether to run away to save himself or give me a hug. We decided it was time for me to get off the pill).

I did okay for the first 6 months on the Paragard except for the ridiculously heavy periods! The first three months had me about ready to go take the thing out myself.  When people say their periods are heavy on this thing, it’s no joke. TMI but I literally bled more than I did after the birth of my children.  I’m talking super plus tampon changed less than an hour in just to help feel like there was a little relief, along with a super plus pad on for protection. These leveled out a bit, but the periods are still much heavier than normal.

About 6 months ago, something started to change for me mentally, although, it took me about 3 months to even notice/figure it out. I knew that postpartum depression can still hit at different stages during the first year or so after the birth of a baby, but while I couldn’t quite put a finger on it, this didn’t seem to be the issue.  About 3 months ago, I figured out that each month about a week or so prior to my period starting I was an emotional roller coaster. I am generally a pretty quiet, even-keeled, stress-free person. This started to make me feel as though I was insane. I cannot even fully describe in words what I went through, but, it was like PMS on steroids. One day I would cry at just about anything, the next day I would be so incredibly angry and irritable at people for no apparent reason (while this may seem normal for some, this is very abnormal for me). The kicker was that during that time I would have high anxiety for no apparent reason and felt a sense of impending doom. I would then get depressed and feel like I was not worth anything, my life wasn’t going in the direction I wanted it to be, and would become so deep in my thoughts trying to figure out where I had gone wrong, why things weren’t working out the way I thought they should be. The ups and downs were becoming unbearable.  I felt grateful to be aware of them, but miserable that I couldn’t figure out what to do about it.

At that point I started doing some more research on my own regarding these symptoms and the other issues I was having which were:
-hair loss (not postpartum related),
-abnormal dark hair under chin, top lip, and stomach,
-inability to lose weight (my body literally resets to 268 lbs after every attempt to lose, and I had already lost all pregnancy -weight within the first two months postpartum each time),
-slow metabolism
-exhausted every day/not waking up feeling rested (I literally fall asleep on the couch each night at 8:30 or so)
-zits around chin, sometimes chest
-Slow digestion/infrequent bowel movements
-extreme mood swings
-excessive sweating
-very low libido
-inability to find my words when speaking/poor memory recall

What I found was really interesting! Apparently there are a lot of people out there dealing with copper toxicity mainly, because of the Paragard!  Well okay, that was fine, but if that and condoms are really my only birth control option then what could I do? It was as though I had to choose between me and my husband not having another child, or dealing with the insane side effects of this or another form of birth control pills. While we had used them for years prior, condoms seem to be a mood killer. I was already having extremely low libido issues (not just hormone related, but again – I’m a working mom, 2 young kids…..I’m just plain exhausted!) I didn’t want to add to the problem.

I began reading Dr. Wilson’s slow oxidizer diet plan (read more about it here: The Slow Oxidizer Eating Plan and decided to give it a try.  Amazingly, within 10 days I lost 6 pounds by simply eating the specific foods listed in the diet. It’s one of those no-brainer things. Of course you’ll lose weight when you eat healthy, right? My issue is and always has been sticking to it. Even though I saw great results, life got the best of me. I messed up one meal, then another then a day turned into a week, and so on.

I was fed up! I decided to see a naturopathic doctor to see if they could give me some answers. Don’t worry, not all of them are crazy juicing and supplement pushing quacks!  I already knew what I needed to do, but I wanted to understand what exactly was going on with my body so that I knew the why.  Maybe the “why” would drive me to be more motivated to continue my efforts.

The naturopath did a huge comprehensive set of labs called the Boston Heart Diagnostics test, as well as my copper and zinc, and a few other hormones. This was amazing! This test comes with a huge color-coded personalized booklet explaining where your levels fall within the recommended ranges and whether you’re at risk for things such as heart disease, diabetes, etc. It also showed areas of inflammation, metabolics, genetics, liver, kidney, hormones and thyroid levels.

My tests revealed that I did not have any hormone imbalance except my DHEA levels were raised which is why I have the excessive dark facial hair, and there’s not much I can do about that. I don’t have diabetes, am not prediabetic, nor am I at risk for diabetes over the next 10 years according to this testing. I am, however, insulin resistant.  This confused me! How could I not have diabetes or be at risk for it, but still be insulin resistant? This website explains a lot: http://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/health-topics/Diabetes/insulin-resistance-prediabetes/Pages/index.aspx#metabolic “…….not everyone with these disorders has insulin resistance, and some people may have insulin resistance without getting these disorders [metabolic syndrome, type 2 diabetes, PCOS, etc].

People who are obese or who have metabolic syndrome, insulin resistance, type 2 diabetes, or prediabetes often also have low-level inflammation throughout the body and blood clotting defects that increase the risk of developing blood clots in the arteries. These conditions contribute to increased risk for CVD.”

Which brings me to the next piece of the puzzle. How could I have such PCOS-like symptoms, but not have PCOS!? My copper levels were elevated, and my zinc levels were low.  So, I was right about that piece! My worries about copper toxicity starting to occur were true.

But, it doesn’t stop there. I found out that I have a genetic marker MTHFR. I am apparently an overmethylator. Right now I’m still doing my own research on this gene mutation and I won’t even pretend that I know a whole lot about it, BUT, it explains sooooo much of the issues and symptoms that I have been facing!  This is also the cause of the high copper/low zinc, high pain tolerance (I only took tylenol/ibuprofen the 2nd day after my c-section), anxiety, no motivation, weight gain, low levels of inflammation in several areas of the body, the list goes on.

There are several good websites explaining the different types of this MTHFR genetic marker as some people can be over or under methylators, so PLEASE DO NOT SELF DIAGNOSE! You must have the labs done to properly identify any of these issues, so please do not think that because you may have similar issues that you have the same condition and can treat it the same.  Luckily, while there isn’t a “cure” there are diet changes and supplements you can take to help change your health around.

For me, it was suggested that I remain on the slow oxidizer/anti-inflammatory diet and possibly even try hCG injections. I also need to take magnesium, zinc, and fish oil to start.  I’m sure I’ll be adding a few more supplements later. While the hCG sublingual drops had worked for me pretty well in the past (and now I know why) I wasn’t quite ready to spend the money on the injections yet.  I need to work on actually sticking with something that actually works!

So, I’m back at it again – a modified hCG diet. I’m trying to give myself some grace with this thing because I have a hard time sticking with it. It’s been 6 days and, while I’m not seeing huge losses like I would normally if strictly following the protocol, I am still dropping slowly which is fine by me. I’d rather see the scale go down than up!  I’m writing all of this information because it was amazing to finally know WHY I was trying everything, knew something was wrong but no one had an answer for me, and now I finally have the answer. I still have a lot to do and a lot to learn, but at least I know the exact direction I need to be going! That brings me some peace when it seemed like the odds were stacked against me to be able to lose weight.

Slowly succeeding

We’re on day 20 of our 90 Day Challenge. I am down 5 pounds, Elbert is now down 11 pounds. I’m only SLIGHTLY jealous….We’re still just continuing on with our clean eating and ViSalus shakes twice per day.  We’re also each trying to drink 2-2.5 liters of water each per day.  It gets tough.  We were never really big soda drinkers or anything, but we do love our energy drinks.  I generally tried to only have them on the weekends, and I only drank the sugar free/0 carb ones, but they’re still bad!  So my goal, really, is to try to get away from artificial sweeteners.

Speaking of ingredients……I know there’s a lot of different “stuff” out there praising ViSalus products and also trashing them, big time.  Here’s my personal opinion on it.  If you are a person who is very overweight, and I can say that because I’m over 250 pounds, and you’ve been searching for something that will help speed up the process of taking the weight off, then it doesn’t necessarily matter whether there are a few “junk” ingredients in this product.  Yes, it’s a packaged food, there’s going to be some ingredients in it to help preserve it’s shelf life.  I can see if you were a person who didn’t have too much too lose, or are very concerned about what goes into your body, then you’re in an different place and a different mindset than most.  And if that’s the case, then sure, use something else that works for you! No need to bash anything – I’m pretty sure you can go in to any vitamin/supplement or drugstore and find all sorts of crap on the shelves claiming to help people, not to mention all the other independent companies out there claiming the same. It’s really just a matter of choice and finding what works for you.

Here’s the thing – I’m pretty sure that being 50, 100, or more pounds overweight and the risks and dangers you face dealing with that weight (which may not be an issue for you at the moment, but continue it for 10, 20 years you’re bound to start having some problems!) and the items that you consume on a regular basis that “maintain” that type of lifestyle — the bad stuff in that far outweighs the bad stuff in using ViSalus shakes for a short period of time – be it 90 Days to a year – to try to get that weight off.  I do know, however, that ViSalus has helped thousands of people lose weight so it can’t be that bad!  And, if you’re a person like me who’s actually serious about losing 116 pounds, you’d realize that it may not happen in 90 Days.  During that 90 Days you also need to educate yourself on how to eat properly, begin putting exercise back in to your life, all those things.  Yes, ViSalus doesn’t have “coaches” like some other companies, but who’s to say those people are actually “qualified” to “coach” anyone when they themselves are battling weight. Their mission, though, is that you don’t go at it alone.

So, you can reach out to those people who have actually succeeded and say hey, what did you do? What worked for you?  Just like I continue to try different combinations of things to see what will work best for me.  I didn’t put the weight on overnight, it’s not going to come off overnight.  That’s why I’m focusing at least four 90 Day Challenges during this entire year on losing the weight.  I work a sedentary job full time, I have several businesses on the side, I have a husband and church activities, and I’m a first time mom to a busy 1 1/2 year old — I don’t always have “time” to figure all this stuff out.  But I do know that if I can make it a goal to eat clean 75% – 95% of the time, and use my shakes to help me reach my goals because if you’re eating well, using the shakes and exercising it works! Then I know that this year I will actually achieve my goal.  It may not be as quickly as I like, but unless I am able to dedicate 8 hours per day to work with a trainer and go to the gym to work out for hours like all of these reality shows depict, then the weight isn’t just going to fall off of me! So I have to lower my expectations that the weight is going to come off quickly when I’m not putting in the work to do it.  You cannot drink the shakes and then eat {insert favorite fast food restaurant here} every night for dinner and step on the scale next week disappointed that you didn’t lose anything.   But, any loss, big or small, is still a success and gets you that much closer to your goal.

Also wanted to mention people who say,  just eat properly with the right portion size, and exercise – you’ll lose the weight.  Yes, that can be very true and is easy for someone to say who 1) is not or never has been extremely overweight.  I’m not talking 20 pounds overweight, I’m talking hundred(s); or 2) has already lost the weight they wanted to lose in that way.  Again, there are so many different factors as to why certain ways don’t or cannot work for certain people.  Not all fat people are just plain lazy.  Some are, but not all.  Me personally, I’ve been working at it for years.  I don’t have the time, money, motivation, etc. etc. to lose weight.  But that doesn’t mean that I’m going to sit back and give up on it.  I’ve tried so many different “diets” I’ve gone several different doctors to have so many different tests performed to see if there was anything wrong with me or preventing me from losing.  Nothing came up.  Their answer was that I could just have bariatric surgery.  Not a good enough reason for me.  So it tells me that I just need to muster up the strength to try harder.

In the beginning of this blog I was saying I was slightly jealous of my husband for losing so much faster than I have.  But, if I really look at it, I’ve dropped 5 pounds since starting the Challenge 20 days ago.  Im’ being pretty good about mostly eating clean and using the shakes.  That’s still a 1/4 pound loss per day!  Even if the amount is “smaller” than I’d like it to be, it’s still a loss, and I’m still getting closer to my goal.  I’m slowly succeeding!

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